Wildflowers, felt good beneath my feet
The wind blew tangles in my hair
Clickety!
Sunday, July 27, 2008 @ 12:48 AM
Haha gone? No not really.
http://stxcy.livejournal.com (:
I know I keep jumping from here to there, but really, livejournal is so much better.
See you on the other side! :D
Sick, happy, tanned, happy, loved, happy, tired, happy, ...
Thank you:
Marcus Lim, Korkor, Chris, Rachel, Fiona, Joel, Philip, Steph, Tabbi, Walter, Chowchow, Ryan, Aunty Esther, Leona, Joy, Gary, Ruth, Meiqi, Warren Lee, Wenkai, Marcus Lee, Dennis, Jialiang, Jasmine, Daniel, Elgin, Anna, Warren Tan, Stuart, Lihong, Isabella, Keith, Benson, Sharizal,
for your smses/phonecalls/MSN messages/tags/friendster comments. I love you allllllllll.
Also to someone, thank you for the pleasant surprise & the oreo cheese cake! (:
Last but not least, thank You Lord, for seeing me through yet another year.
I spent almost the whole day alone, missed school today because I felt sick in morning ): couldn't resist the sun so I went out to tan in the afternoon. I had the whole pool to myself so the time spent was just me myself & I. Ah feels so good to be alone once in awhile (: somebody smsed me around seven in the evening asking me to go to the void deck & bring a lighter. Thank youuuu so much for making all the way here (: for the first time in a long time I finally blew out a candle & made a wish. So other than this person, the ones that I've seen in this whole day is my mum, my brother & my dad. Hahahaha I sound so pathetic it's like I'm some emo-kid that shuts myself out from the rest of this world.
*\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/*
Sixteen of em' because I turn sixteen on the sixteenth.
(Can't you see they're cheerleaders with their pompoms.)
Maybe tomorrow I'll leave my computer alone & switch off my cellphone. I'll wake up early & be a happy girl. I'll make myself breakfast, then take a nice long bath. Next I'll throw on my Manchester United jersey, put on my pink sneakers & wear the white cap. I'll head out to the places that I've never been to/haven't been to in a long time. I'll capture everything with my camera so that I'll still have a little bit of it to keep untill I'm grey & wrinkly. I will then settle down at my favourite Japanese restaurant & I will finally have a proper meal. Then I'll head off to the Ben & Jerry's at Dempsey Hill & order a Vermonster. Becoming fat would be the last thing on my mind, I'll finish everything & I'll enjoy myself. After that I will walk to Orchard with my headphones blasting all of my favourite songs from Hillsong. While walking I will sing like nobody can hear me & I won't care how horrible I'll sound. I will go shopping & I won't hold back, I will buy everything that catches my eye even if they are unecessary. Next I'll go shopping for presents for the people that's in my 'people that I will love until the day I die' list. I'll spend forever choosing the perfect present for each individual. Next I will sit down at a Starbucks & order my favourite dark mocha frappuchino. Then maybe I will catch a movie, order popcorn, laugh/cry my hardest & hug myself when I feel cold. Next I'll go to Labrador Park, sit near the jetty & catch the sunset. I will sit & watch the amazing ball of fire go beyond the horizon while my favourite songs play. After night falls I will head home on my own, & I won't be afraid at all. Because for the whole day, I haven't been alone. There has been One Person with me all along.
I just want to spend my birthday with You.
Then I'llshop study.
Then I'llshop study.
Then I'llshop study.
Then I'llshop study.
Then I'llshop study.
Then I'llshop study.
Then I'llshop study.
Then I'llshop study.
Then I'llshop study.
Then I'llshop study.
Then I'llshop study.
Then I'llshop study.
Then I'llshop study.
Then I'llshop study.
Then I'llshop study.
Then I'llshop study.
Then I'llshop study.
Then I'llshop study.
Then I'llshop study.
Then I'llshop study.
Then I'llshop study.
Today when I was walking towards home I actually picked flowers. When I reached the lift I decided that I didn't really want to take them home, so I scattered all of them onto the ground. I honestly thought they looked quite pretty all over the place, even though they didn't belong there. Forty-five minutes after I reached home, mummy came back with Brayden & she went, 'I wonder which idiot littered the ground floor with flowers!!'
STUART TAN
• Stacy; says:
I NEED MOTIVATION TO STUDY
• Stacy; says:
HELP
Stuart. † Created a Blog, PLEASE GO TAG.. THANKS [STUDYING]. says:
Stacy, study.
Stuart. † Created a Blog, PLEASE GO TAG.. THANKS [STUDYING]. says:
there you go.
What the hell hahahaha. Sometimes I really feel like asking God: WHY HAVE YOU GIVEN ME SUCH A COUSIN?!!!!!!!!
(But it's okay Stuart Tan Jiazhi I still love you the same!)
Anyanyanyanyanyanyanyanyanyanyway. I'm still happy, currently it's raining cats & dogs outside but it's not dampening my mood at all (: I'm so happy my thoughts are all over the place so haha I actually feel kind of crazy right now.
I woke up in time for class today, & Ryan didn't call (thank God) Breakfast was on him & it's all thanks to the coffee that kept me awake during service. So thank youuuu Ryan.
I borrowed Joel's EZlink card today because mine ran out of cash & it was quite dumb to walk to NAFA under that scorching sun. Hahahaha I had such a good laugh at his photo. Speaking about photos, I was so upset when I got back my photos this early afternoon because both my frames were scratched, & at that moment in time I really felt like screaming at those people there but that's not going to erase the scratches anyway so...
But to think that they're an arts school, & yet they actually don't even take care of other people's works. If they were the ones trusting their works into someone else's hands, & the people that received their works actually damaged it, how would they feel about it? I was telling Korkor that I should've just scolded the shit out of them, & demand payment or something hahaha.
You can go on & say that I'm overreacting, I'm not stopping you, but my works just mean a lot to me. Fullstop.
(But they don't mean so much to the extend that I would feel like I would die if God were to ever ask me to sacrifice them)(Hahahahahaha hi Philip we are people not of this world!)
There's still another three days to my birthday but I feel loved already. Thank you all so much, especially to those that actually wants to sponsor my shopping as a birthday present (many hugssss for you people), also to the people that didn't know what to give me & just gave me cash, you guys really didn't have to!!! & not forgetting Walter & Marcus Lim! You guys are so adorable hahaha. Love the cap & your cards! (:
I miss cutting birthday cakes. Seriously. I think the last time I actually cut a cake was when I was erm ten. Hahahaha oh no I have no childhood/life.
Okay it's bedtime & there's another five days of hell (according to Steph) ahead.
Psalm 37:4 - "Delight yourself in the Lord & He shall give to you the desires of your heart."
Because:
1. Lunch was great.
It feels like the last time I actually stepped into Plaza Sing or rather anywhere near town was like erm four thousand years ago (I think if I feel that way then it must be it) So yes I have no life. Lunch was at Ajisen, Starbucks after that, mmmm I love DMF so much but yes I love Tabbi & Steph & Isa & Aunty Lydia much more hahaha.
2. Received my first birthday present (:
Thank you Philipppp so much for the beearlied (it's the opposite of belated) present (: it's really cute hahaha (:
3. JG was great.
Ah, nuff' said (:
4. Joel bought me Toblerone (yayyyy)
An insanely overdued 'reward' but hahaha thank you so much!
(Anyway. I forgot to tell you something just now & I probably won't see you tomorrow so just to let you know: I have quite a lot to tell you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
5. Dinner was great.
Yay Pastamaniaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! Sam, KS, Isa, Chow, Ryan, Steph, Philip & I finished erm. Five (yes five) cans of cheese. Out of the five, Steph, Philip & I probably finished four (I'm serious.) Chow, Ryan & KS were being so annoying after the rest left, they were so desperate to squeeeezeeee 'information' out of me. It was so ridiculous. Hi guys, nice try today but better luck next time! (:
Okay my little teddy bear says she wants a hug & I've got to get up at !!!!!!!! six forty-five tomorrow so byeeeeeeeeeee.
(Ryan wants to wake me up tomorrow because he thinks that I'll be so drowsy in the morning I'll acidentally spill something out. Idiot.)
Walnut: That's not my name!
Me: Idiot!
Walnut: That's not my name!
Fiona: Stupid!
Walnut: That's not my name!
Me: CRAZY STUPID IDIOT
Walnut: THAT'S NOT MY NAME!!!! THAT'S NOT MY NAME!!!!!!!!
(Inside joke.)
I love my buddies :D
There's another hundred & one days to go. This will probably be the last national exam I'll ever take in my life & this is my chance to make up for all these years. How many times have I screwed up my papers because I resorted to 'last-minute' studying? This time I can't afford to repeat this mistake. Some people may see freedom in about four months time, but I see it as a insane rush to the top.
This is a mad race, but I'm glad I still have the people that care in my life! (:
(Thank you Joy for being there! ♥♥♥♥♥♥)(Sorry that I kind of drowned you in all of my rantings)
Lunch tomorrow with Tab Steph Isa + Aunty Lydia. Now THAT'S something to look forward to.
Well I didn't even get through one chapter.
When boredom screams at you, 'kill me!!!':
Love bestieeee
Erm... No.
Haha Warren Lee you retarded nonsense.
Hello Dennissss
This was an unintentional shot I promiseeee (he was just changing in class)
Dennis: Delete the picture!!!!
Warren: CAN YOU STOP THROWING YOUR RUBBISH INTO MY POCKET!!
Me: (:
This is the picture that we snapped when our Physics teacher went: 'PERPENDICULAR DISTANCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" (the next second Warren was laughing his ass off. Literally)
♥ Fiona & Dennis & Warren Leeee.
The four of us just got 'separated' today thanks to the new sitting arrangement. Dennis is now at the other side of the classroom, Warren is two seats infront of us, while Fiona & I are still next to each other.
I miss my best friend(sss)!!!! ):
This morning, Josephine wore her PE shorts the wrong way round & it was so hilarioussss. We had such a good laugh hahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaa.
During our free period we had a huge debate about Christianity, Jesus & everything along that line. It was the Christians against the non-Christians (duh) & it was funny, in a way. But yet at the same time it was truly fustrating because it was the three of us (Dennis, Fiona & yours truly) against Larry, Niegel, Desmond, Sihao & Jiehan. They were just throwing questions (that I honestly will label as stupid but then again I can't blame them because they have never expierienced Christ's love) in our faces & it was crazy. It was really really crazy. I wished I could've done better, but I'm glad we tried. The most hair-ripping/fist-clenching part was that whatever we said, the five of them just treated it as crap.
I was so proud of Dennis throughout the whole thing. He really tried his best to counter everything that the guys threw at us. When Desmond said something about God rescuing only the 'good' people & not the 'bad', Dennis replied "God loves everyone". It may be a simple, three word sentence, but he said it with such conviction.
& that shut the five of them up. For awhile.
Well another day just went by like that.
Quek is leaving for NS tomorrow. Mannnn it really seems like yesterday it was still 04' JG camp & he still had his bleached hair! But like what I told him yesterday, in life all of us have to move on in one way or another...
Marcus Lim's birthday was yesterday. Which means that mine must really be coming (our birthdays are a week apart)
I'm making full use of this last week. I'm going to use this seven days, to forget & let go of all that has happened in the previous year. Sure, time flies, but it's still been long year. Though sometimes when I think of certain things, I still feel the pain, but I'm thankful...
It will all get better in time.
Sure, I've been stumbling, falling, & flopping all this while. But still I choose to thank You for every break that's in my heart, because I know that no matter how bruised or battered I am, I am still safe in Your hands. Your strength is above all strengths, & I make it through each day with your daily sufficient grace. In just a week or so I'll be another year older & I don't know what awaits me in the next year, but I will still put my trust in You.
I've reached yet another dead-end & You know I feel like trash. I do hate how for all this while, there's been more reasons for me to cry & be upset about, rather than for me to smile. When I'm not even over what happened before, another piece of nonsense hits me straight in the face. It all adds up... In a way. I know it'skind of dumb to let everything go just because of all the nonsense that's been going on lately, but other than fighting back & proving the other party wrong, I don't know what else to do. You know I never liked to back down, nor do I like letting anyone step over me. Now everything's screwed up. Was it entirely my fault?
It's painful but I've got to do it. I've got, to do it. I can't fall with my eyes shut, because I can't rely on certain people to catch me anymore.
But You'll still be there, right?
School was so insanely boring, partly because Dennis wasn't around for me to make a fuss about, met him on the bus when I was returning home & it turned out that he got suspended because of his hair (hahahahahahahaha serve you right.)
I had to serve a three hour detention today. Which was. Shitttt. It was quite dumb to be sitting outside the detention room but still I'm proud to say that I've completed four Physics papers. Just when I was blanking out after two hours or so, my 'Saviour' came (:
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Karim!!!!!!!!! Omg hahaha I love him so much. He plopped himself on the bench that's opposite mine, suddenly said "I've got chocolate" & mannnn you should've seen the way my eyes literally lit up at the sound of 'chocolate'. So the both of us sat there, munching away, talking rubbish, being stupid... Untill he had to go sit at the other bench because we got caught ):
Shit it's Wednesday tomorrow.
To put it bluntly, who are you to me? Why should I let you make me feel upset? I don't think I'll ever be bothered to even poke the tip of my nose into your life anymore. You keep losing my respect for you.
I walked through your door & into your life, but it's also time you learnt the fact that I can walk out of it anytime.
I always said that I'll be here for you, but really, you shouldn't take it for granted.
I slept for twelve hours straight. I know I ought to be happy about it but honestly I woke up feeling quite terrible because it was somebody's sms that woke me up (it was an sms sent to the wrong number)(thanks, whoever you are) & after that I couldn't go back to sleep ):
LH & I were supposed to catch a movie together with Fiona but hahaha she must've pissed her mum off real bad or something because she refused to let her out of the house. So LH & I decided to do a bit of window shopping ($$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ please drop from Heaven), a bit of munching on nonsense, a bit of bitching...
Speaking which, YOUTUBE IS CURRENTLY BEING A BITCH!!!!
Okay anyway. We hit the library then it's off to her place. I seriously feel like keeping another hamster ): I wonder how's Duke doing. (Honestly I think Duke should be dead by now because I had him when I was. Erm, nine.)
I'm quite afraid that the little thing would make my room smell like trash because there's nowhere else in the house I can keep it. My brother would just squash it to death or something. & then you know what they always say about 'the responsibility of having a pet'... I really feel kind of useless so I guess right now it's better that I don't take on any responsibility (haha.)
I wonder if I should give it a shot & join Danzity. Sure, I do miss dancing, I really really do. It's been forever since I could actually say, 'Give me a dancefloor, a DJ, & I'll feel better'. Maybe I've already forgotten how it feels like to hit the floor at the end of a tired long day, how I would actually feel better once I sweat it all out & let go of all the pent-up emotions that are inside. I know what I've been resorting to is bad, but should I sacrifice... Myself? Like what somebody told me, there's gotta be a boundary somewhere. How far would I let a person have his/her way with me?
Such emotion, such passion, such intensity. I really doubt myself. I don't think I'll ever be able to do it like that again.
God provides =)
Joel. Learned to let go. says:
literally
• Stacy; says:
"okay God i won't work i know You'll provide"
• Stacy; says:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Joel. Learned to let go. says:
I SLAP U
Went to school early this morning for the stupid paper. There was this very interesting yet annoying question:
Some countries oppose to the use of GM food. What is your opinion? Explain.
My answer:
I don't think any countries should oppose to the use of GM food because they really do make life better.
The best part is that the question's worth eight marks.
I finished the whole paper exactly fifty-five minutes after it started. When I finished my last sentence (which was also the one on the GM food), I put down my pen, looked around, & realised that everyone was still scribbling away. I thought, shitttt.
I then spent the next thirty-five minutes thinking of ponies & bubblegums & pretty dresses & erm Ryan Giggs.
Imma score for the paper & so pass it with flying colours hahahaha.
Collected my photos today & I just finished my write-ups on both photos about an hour ago. I seriously amaze myself at times. I only had 72 hours or so to complete everything (thanks to my very wonderful teacher that only told me on Thursday that the deadline's tomorrow) & yup it's all done & I'm very happy (:
Finally, a little bit of shopping today. The checkpoint is the best place to get bargains, I promise. Ditched my old white sneakers & bought new ones today. I think very soon I won't be able to tolerate the fact that they're so white so yes I'll probably be putting a little bit of glitter on them soon (:
I am now in love with the erm little shrimps thing they have at Long John's. They look cute, seriously. Oh they taste yummy too. I really think it's just about time I saved myself & hide away all the weighing machines at home because I think I will just die when I weigh myself.
Ivan: Wow you kept your shoes so clean.
Me: Erm it's because I just bought them today.
Tomorrow would be a longggggggggggggggg day ):
IF YOU STILL HAVE A LITTLE BIT OF BRAINS, THEN I HOPE YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO. BUT I GUESS YOUR BRAIN IS PROBABLY LIQUID-SHIT, SO I'M TELLING YOU NOW WHAT TO DO.
YOU JOLLY WELL STAY AWAY FROM MY KILL.
I KNOW WHAT'S UP YOUR SLEEVE, SO DON'T PLAY GAMES WITH ME.
YOU, JOLLY, WELL, STAY, AWAY, FROM, MY, KILL.
As a friend I believe I have already done my part. You refuse to move on with your life, too bad, because I will move on with mine. The next time history repeats itself, I will not care. I promise you, I will not care. You get yourself in this situation, then you jolly well get yourself out of it. It is pointless for me to put out my hand anymore, because we all know how the ending would be.
This time I am really disappointed in you. Really. You make me want to give up all hope on you.
He can only fill you up this much. He makes you happy for awhile. Tell me other than the adrenaline rush you get from his fucking, what can he give to you?
You let him play around with you. You let him call you a slut. You let him make you cry. You let him break your heart. You let him use you as a sperm toilet. & as if that's not enough, you return back to him after he says some pathetic words, & maybe a few smses with the words 'I'll change'
Have a little bit more self-dignity, would you?
& no I don't bloody give a damn as to who sees this. I repeat: I Don't Give A Damn.
Today I had a very happy walk under the rain.
I was thinking, do we only fall for people that are like ourselves, because we all relate to things that are familiar? Or do we go for the people that are worlds apart from us, because they are just simply everything that we're not?
Then, is it possible, to have an ineffable feeling of affection for someone you're not even familiar or acquainted with?
How many times can you actually fall in love? Once? Twice? A million times? At times it feels like you've loved too much, yet sometimes you feel like you've never really loved anyone before. Sometimes we fall for the same person over again. Why? Is it because you've never really got over him/her? Or is it that you just simply Care for the same person, & you love him/her in a different way? Sometimes we say we feel a sense of affection towards a person that we're unfamiliar with. Why? Don't we only fall for people that we know & trust? Or is it just simply, infatuation? Sometimes people around us get together & they say it was 'love at first sight'. Why? Is it possible to fall for somebody only by laying eyes on them? Is it even possible to fall for someone when we don't even know them? Sometimes we fall out of love & we fall into the arms of someone else with great ease. Why? If we're able to get over the past relationship with such great ease, then previously we weren't really in love, right? Then again, how come when we're still in it, we say we're "in love"?
How, do you even fall in love? No really, how?
Then again, no, I think I'd want to keep you in there.
Even though somebody just pissed me off, I refuse to focus on the unhappy things tonight. No not tonight. I ought to be happy.
I loveeee my best friend(s). They're amazing. No really, I mean it, they're amazing. Yesterday evening we sat at the staircase near Lynn's place for about an hour or so, happily bitching about anything & everything.
& then we happily set my camera on timer:
Missing Rachel ):
I love you guys because you all make looking/being stupid ridiculously fun, because of the way you can make me burst out into laughter when I'm at the pits, because we always made up no matter what the reason was for falling out with one another, because of all the love & support you have given to me, because of the way you would stand up for me, because I can be who I am when I'm around you guys, because of the way you guys always seem to understand even when I say nothing at all, because of how our personalities compliment each other's, because of the way we used to sit outside our class playing random songs from Rachel's phone & singing our hearts out (though once in awhile we go out of tune), because of the way we'll link our hands together when we're out, because of the way we always make fun of one another's typo errors... Because of the endless reasons, of why I love you.
This is a foursome (:
Well anyway. School today, believe it or not, was fun.
Fiona & I decided to join our tables with Dennis & Warren since the both of them seemed really lonely (haha), so for almost the whole of today, the four of us were actuallyquite very crazy. You should've seen how Warren cheered at the end of Miss Ng's lesson & how he starting whining & kicking up a HUGE fuss about Algebra -.-
I think Fiona should be labeled as the joke-of-the-day. During lesson today she gave up copying the notes on the screen because she couldn't see (she forgot her spectacles.) My dearest best friend then happily crushed, smashed, rolled the foolscap paper into a pathetic little ballll, left it on her table & wasted her time away. At the end of the lesson, the teacher went, "I want to take a look at your work so please hand it up." Fiona then looked at me & went, "Shitttt."
Quote of the day: Sour Unbearables!!!!
Heehee I love my buddies so much.
I'm half-caught in the middle. A part of me don't want to sink into it but then another part of me is saying to put my heart into it & just, try.
Certain people are happy & they want me to go ahead with it. Fiona went "let nature take its course" but then again, what if history repeats itself? What if things wound up to be just like what happened eleven months ago? Besides... ):
At this moment, right now, there's only one thing that I'm clear of - I can't afford to make reckless decisions anymore.
I seriously think that YW* is, !!!! cute. Ah-ma-gaddddd he's so cute he makes me want to hug & suffocate him.
Me: Hopeless case.
Fiona: No!!!! There's still hope!!!!
Me: -.- How come you are more determined than me? -.-
Fiona is so crazily mean, because of YW she actually put down somebody else that's, wellllllllllll. Close. To her.
(Hi Fiona if you're reading this I'm actually laughing already)(I promise to make an effort to go over to your place more often hahahahaha)
& then your royal highness had to try so insanely hard to push the oh-so-delightfully-adorableeee boy out of my head & return back to my books ):
* Names have been changed hahahaha (well you'll never know who comes by here)
Anyway, I feel like a pig. Yesterday in the middle of the night, my little tummy decided to give its owner a hell of a time & went crazy. It was like the food I pampered myself with about 5 hours ago just reduced to tiny microscopic things. So I, despite all my efforts to keep myself on the chair that I'm sitting on now, broke loose & like an excited puppy that's unleashed, I ran (yes ran) to the kitchen, ate two apples, a whole bar of Toblerone, downed a packet of chocolate milk, finished up the leftovers from dinner (pork chop heeheeheeeeeyummeh) with an insane amount of tomato ketchup (:, fried myself an egg, ate butter cookies...
Then, finally, my tummy was satisfied & I returned back to this computer, a very happy girl.
& to make me feel even more like a pig, I woke up at two today. But then again, sleeping makes me happy. So I'm a happier girl.
& My body clock is returning to normal. Finally it knows what's day & night. Yay. I'm a very, insanely, happy, girl (: (: (: (:
On a heavier note, despite my crazy mugging, I've another seven chapters of notes to complete ): & I don't know where the hell are my notes on Newtonian Mechanics. I hope after my MYEs I didn't take them as some trash & just simply chuck them into the chute. I seriously seriously seriously hope they aren't already disintegrated into erm. Little pieces of things.
Gym on Monday, anyone?
Okay bedtime.
(Shit the boy is still in my head.)
YAY WEEKENDS YAY!
Hit the gym yesterday with Neoneo Machi & Lihong, together with Dennis,Warren War-ran, David Goh, Larry, Desmond & Niegel (Oh-See-Toh hahahaha.) My arms are aching terribly but I think all nine of us should have abs now because we, laughed, so, much. The guys made me feel so weak because I could barely lift some of the weights ): War-ran went hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha so much I think he nearly died laughing. I then imitated our very adorable English teacher & went, shut upppp.
Certain interesting events took place & certain people definitely gave Neoneo Machi & I something to talk about, I admit it was wrong to talk about somebody like that but seriously, it's time some people stop acting like they're on top of the world & that they're in control of everything. When you get into trouble yourself, I'd definitely like to see what sort of reaction you'd give. Sure, yesterday I could've picked up my phone & simply punch in some numbers but what's the point? That's only going to waste money and besides, being a girl it was already wrong to be there to witness all that happened. If you think I'm a selfish bitch that refuses to help my friends when they're in trouble, then carry on with that thinking of yours because it doesn't hurt me in any way. I've been there, done that, & I just don't get myself involved with such things anymore. If you think it's tough being in a fight, grow up, because it's tougher to walk away from one.
I was talking to Chris the other day & I wondered why everybody calls me Stacy & no one calls me Stace anymore.
Well anyway.
Things are looking up. Well it seems to be, though there are times at night I still feel like something is missing. Certain things I used to find as easy as 123 are now becoming difficult. I wonder why is that so. Have I not been trying? Have I been looking in all the wrong places? Have I been searching too far, when You're beside me, all along? I know Your plans are to prosper & not to harm, but how come I've been taking matters into my own hands, instead of trusting You? How come sometimes it just feels like, You're not here?
Damn enough of that I feel so depressed now. Anyway, Ms Shirley came to look for Meiqi & I yesterday. Her little piece of news definitely ignited something in me (: I know that I'd be picking up yet another thing that I could just leave alone, but it's near impossible to just let this chance pass me by. I guess now I've got to manage my time well-er than well, because this would be taking up quite some time & time, is something that I really need a lot & can't afford to waste. This is one huge risk, but let's imagine, if I clinch the scholarship...
I once told God that if, there was one last thing He'd do for me, I'd want Him to take me away from here & bring me somewhere else. Tonight yet another somebody I know is leaving for Australia, & I just can't help but think, what I'm going to do if I'm the one leaving for another place. All my family & friends are here in Singapore & if I really were to go, I know it'll take a lot of me to just say goodbye. There's a lot to consider, a lot to think about. It'll be tough adapting to a new environment, it'll hurt. But the thought of starting anew somewhere else, in a place where nobody knows my name, definitely beats staying around here, hands down. Maybe, just maybe, if there's a good enough reason for me to stay, I would.
Nothing is holding me back now. Nobody is stopping me. I know all along I've been randomly saying that I want to go get a tattoo, but nowadays I've been seriously thinking of getting one to mark this point of my life. I'm thinking of getting a Kanji tattoo on my back, so I should get Tabbi to do my draft for me (: Pain? Screw pain. Pain is nothing.
Ah, this has been such a long wordy post. Well done if you've managed to read everything, o' faithful reader.
I give all of you (except Chris) permission to knock my head if I'm caught doing anything else other than studying on Sundays afternoon.
I had no freaking guts to pop the sleeping pills so I had another sleepless night. Again. Sigh.
I bet today Fiona had a wonderful time at home & in bed while I was stuck in school ): I got caught daydreaming during Physics, left seven out of twenty-two Maths questions blank (-.-), forced myself to stay awake & paid attention to le' monster that's a hundred & seven years old (haha), got veryyyy annoyed by Ammonia gas, actually for once felt smart during ASP, went over to Fiona's (Sebas VERY conveniently called me to buy food for him -.-) & actually managed to revise on my so-called exam next Saturday (GAH SATURDAYYYY!!!!!!)
I miss my guitar. It's been sitting at the corner in my room for four thousand years & I've been ignoring its screams for attention. I ought to restring it soon. Yes soon.
Well for now I shall try to close my eyes & go into the periodic state of rest for the mind & body. Oh God I neeeed sleeeep.
Tonight I find myself, kneeling by the bed to pray
I haven't done this in awhile, so I don't know what to say
"But Lord I feel so small sometimes, in this big old place,
Yeah I know there's more important things,
But don't forget to remember me."
School was a bore & my timetable suckssss to the core.
Thank you Fiona for listening to me today, I felt so much better after pouring everything out (: don't know what I'd do without you & I'm really thankful that God has placed you in my life. Love you best friend.
Crossroads. I have no time to spare so I'm making my decision now, I can't waste anymore time being sandwiched. I need to get over it. Putting a hold on my commitments & letting go really isn't easy... Then again I guess certain sacrifices have to be made if I want to become who I want to be.
God you know I really want to trust my whole being & my whole life into Your hands. Right now I just don't know how to.
Don't forget to remember me.
On a lighter note, I did manage to catch some sleep in school today (haha.) It was recess before my MT lesson, so I happily slept throughout the one & a half hour. I don't remember standing up to greet the teacher, & he didn't bother to wake both me & Fiona up either so...
Met Joel at the Macdonald's at KAP later in the afternoon, & I honestly think he had a really enjoyable time laughing at my previous mid year papers ): sometimes he can really make me feel stupid. But then I did come home smarter (haha), & also with tomato sauce on the sleeve of my 07' JG camp tee.
Joel: It's okay it's both red anyway.
Should ask Luke to slap his face more (HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA.)
I was walking back home today & I was thinking about all that's happened in the past few days. Perhaps instead of dwelling on all the disappointments that certain people keep making me take in, I should start putting in an effort to get over it & look forward. There's still this passion that burns in me despite all that has happened. Maybe one day I'll gain back the same courage & strength I used to have to give it another try. But not now, I guess. I'm too tired.
The people that I trusted in & cared about the most, aren't here. The ones that I originally thought would walk out of my life, are actually the ones that stayed behind & pushed me on. You know who you are (especially the one that stayed up yesterday night & kept encouraging me through your smses until you finally fell asleep), thank you (:
In the days of trouble, You cover me
In the secret place of refuge,
Lord I will, Sing.
we'll be falling asleep in classes
FIONA;FNWQ says:
yah, esp in, tmr got what lesson can slp uh?
• Stacy; says:
oh shit there's no chinese tomorrow
• Stacy; says:
erm...
FIONA;FNWQ says:
maths? =/
FIONA;FNWQ says:
aiya, not mr ng anymore -.-
FIONA;FNWQ says:
EFFF
• Stacy; says:
ya!!!!!!!!!!!!
• Stacy; says:
ZOMG for the first time in my life i wished we had more lectures
I already told you I'd be some freaking nocturnal animal. Looks like I'm not the only one. Maybe I should watch the Spain/Italy match tonight.
Time is passing so quickly it doesn't even feel like half a year is gone. Reality is sinking in & it's so tough, everything seems to be pressing on me all at once. My body clock is currently screwed, so I have no idea how on earth I am going to wake up in time for school, or rather, sleep in time. In the day I'm so ridiculously tired, it's as though my eyelids weigh a ton. Then, at night I'm a freaking nocturnal animal.
I'm going straight for the sleeping pills tomorrow if I don't sleep well again tonight.
I'm so sick & tired of what has been going on. Why do I always seem to breathe in constant disappointment? Why is it that it's always the same people that let me down? It's funny, how the people whom I never really knew well nor confided in, are actually the ones that are encouraging me & pushing me forward. Somebody told me today to enjoy the love I'm surrounded in, but whatever happened to the people that I thought, genuinely cared?
I'd love to stay around, but being sandwiched in such situations can really take a toll on me. Sooner or later I'd still have to make a decision, right?
But maybe all I'm looking for, is just a good enough reason why.
I hope you've had your fun & you're happy, because now I am all messed up. I am only in such a screwed situation not because I am weak, but because your words & your actions are enough to pierce through the strongest soul.
You freaking broke me & said sorry. But then after that you had the damned guts to carry on pushing me around & even made me your sidekick. As if that wasn't enough, you just had to throw my dream on the ground today. Just what the hell do you want from me? Does it thrills you to see me in such a pathetic state now?
I never should've believed you when you said that you genuinely wanted to help me reach the top. All you gave were empty promises.
They are my two new best friends.
This very adorable goose, chased after me right after I snapped the photo ):
Blue skies (:
(:
I am back:
1. refreshed, recharged, & ready to go.
2. with two bags, one filled to the point where it's already impossible to squeeze even a windbreaker in (I went with a bag that's only half filled.)
Out of the 260 hours there, I probably spent 259 hours shopping.
... Okay no.
Anyway, I am too lazy to upload the pathetic 12 or 13 pictures I took during the trip, so you people would have to wait for it (:
The trip was great/fabulous/amazing. Other than that I really don't know how else to describe my trip. Mummy is still the same insane, mum (she told me about how she once fell asleep on a motorbike.) Three cheers for her because she paid for all of my indulgence(s). My little sister is slowly but surely growing up, she's such an adorable little thing she really makes me want to ditch my teddy bear & just hug her to sleep instead. Three cheers for her too because she's just so, delightfully lovable.
The friends & the family, everyone else, are good.
Hi to the church campers (because it'll be at least Thursday when you see this), hope all of you had fun! (:
Bye to everyone else, I'll be missing all of you so miss me too!
See you all lovelies in 10 days' time,
xoxo ♥
It felt really weird being in church on a Sunday morning yet not going for Powerhouse. I think I am already too used to the way things are on a typical Sunday. I love the kids & I know I adore serving in the children's ministry, but right now I really feel that things have already reached a point where it's just like a weekly routine. I'll be away for more than a week, which means that I'll be missing this coming Sunday's event, which also means I have only one more week left to serve in Powerhouse before I put a hold on my commitments. In a way I can't 'bear' to step away, but I guess I should at least get right with myself before I return back to Powerhouse because God deserves my best & nothing less.
Tonight I feel weirdly alone. There's no older brother for me to rant at, no big bully around to bully me, no Sam Chua Ming Shien for me to go 'who lives in a pineapple under the sea', no Chris for me to talk rubbish to when I'm bored, no Walter to suddenly pop out out of nowhere saying random things...
I MISS THE CHURCH CAMPERS!
Okay I feel really depressed now so I should really go to a little dark corner & draw circles.
Anyway before I go, this is erm, for entertainment purposes:
(Hahahaha.)
Between the lines of fear & blame
You begin to wonder why you came
Hahahahahahaaaa shit this is like such a retarded pose.
±Яoѕicky.--\™ meh-ve [[ 10 ]]... ♥ollipers(: says:
just post big big that this is your best and only older brother u got(:
So yes, this is my best & only older brother I've got.
(Sorry ladies, he was an eligible bachelor but is already taken)
Shit-geons.
Watching that amazing ball of fire disappear beyond the horizon was.
My ass muscles are aching. Must be from all the walking yesterday.
Looks like whether or not I go for church camp, I'll still be in Malaysia. Mummy dropped me a message yesterday saying "I'll be fetching you either on Monday or Tuesday." I'm like !!!!!!!! Can you be more impromptu than this?!!!!
Dinner today with some of the JGians was so crazy. We were having some insane "ice war". Sam & his matrix was !!!! Hilarious.
I wonder if Neoneo Machi is back from Hong Kong. I hope that faggot got something back for me.
Hello fellow earthlings, today I:
Noun
1. a. Water condensed from atmospheric vapor and falling in drops. b. A fall of such water; a rainstorm.
But I'm warm inside.
Do you really think that with all the little piece of nonsense that you've been throwing at my way, you can take me down just like that? Is that all you've got? Oh sniggers.
Keep dreaming, I'm not like any of your easy targets. So try me. I've got a stronger backbone than yours, little weakling.
For the record:
1. I have stated very clearly, & not only once - that I am not mad at anyone, only the particular subject. You must've thought too highly of yourself when you said that I was mad at you.
2. Then, despite all that I've said, you still chose to think that I am mad at you. Little girl, do enlighten me, is it my fault now that you don't understand what I'm talking about?
3. Do, for pete's sake, try to stop pushing all the blame to us. Or in this case, to only one person. You guys are picking on the ones that you think are easy targets. Why don't you pick on me instead? Little girl, learn about what's responsibility before you talk to me about anything else.
4. Perhaps you're trying to tell me you have people to be your backbone. But by dragging your friends into the picture, you're only inviting mine to be part of the story.
5. Smart move by mentioning cops but try harder if you want to scare me. I do not see what's wrong in saying that I don't like what you're posting & voicing out how I feel. Oh yes, freedom of speech, right?
6. But for your information, I bet you didn't know that it isn't called 'Freedom of Speech' anymore if what you're saying hurts someone's pride. But if that's your defination of 'Freedom of Speech, then I will go along with your defination.
7. Even people that has nothing to do with this says that you people are sounding like kids that has got nothing better to do. So little girl, if you want to bring me down, you've gotta try much harder.
8. You are not the real deal. I am.
Thankyouhaveaniceday.
(Almost) everyone would be going to Malaysia this coming Sunday for church camp & having fun for the next few days. Stacy here would be stuck in Singapore & at home.
Sad life ):
Namida,
Haruka,
Misha ("Hihi!"),
& Miko (:
Erm no, he's not a doll, obviously. I just thought he was quite hot.
The heavens started to pour when Steph & I left for Lavender. The both of us obviously aren't the type that would carry umbrellas around, so we, braved the rain.
Was on the way to the MRT after JG with Steph, Ryan, Joel & Benett, when we saw a cat that was stuck on some ledge.
Spent 20 whole minutes thinking of how to get the kitty down. I was just about to go into somebody's shop to ask if I could climb through their window so I could get the little thing, when its eyes were finally opened & it jumped into somebody's house through a semi-open window.
Everybody: ............
Me: Yay don't y'all feel better now that the kitty is safe?
Back to City Hall:
I really adore the sisters.
I can actually imagine Namida in a little dark corner.
Behind the scenes:
Yes, it's really not an easy job.
I really apologise for some of the very lousy shots. I actually forgot to bring an extra roll of film so I had no choice but to turn to my little Sony digital camera, which is, sadly, dying on me ):
I hope I don't get "poisoned". Not now at least. The dolls are really pretty & honestly after yesterday, I'm actually quite tempted to get a girl.
...........
Nononononono Stacy, think of your Nikon D80 Nikon D80 Nikon D80 Nikon D80...
Haha gone? No not really.
http://stxcy.livejournal.com (:
I know I keep jumping from here to there, but really, livejournal is so much better.
See you on the other side! :D
Wednesday, July 16, 2008 @ 11:38 PM
Sweet sixteen.
Sick, happy, tanned, happy, loved, happy, tired, happy, ...
Thank you:
Marcus Lim, Korkor, Chris, Rachel, Fiona, Joel, Philip, Steph, Tabbi, Walter, Chowchow, Ryan, Aunty Esther, Leona, Joy, Gary, Ruth, Meiqi, Warren Lee, Wenkai, Marcus Lee, Dennis, Jialiang, Jasmine, Daniel, Elgin, Anna, Warren Tan, Stuart, Lihong, Isabella, Keith, Benson, Sharizal,
for your smses/phonecalls/MSN messages/tags/friendster comments. I love you allllllllll.
Also to someone, thank you for the pleasant surprise & the oreo cheese cake! (:
Last but not least, thank You Lord, for seeing me through yet another year.
I spent almost the whole day alone, missed school today because I felt sick in morning ): couldn't resist the sun so I went out to tan in the afternoon. I had the whole pool to myself so the time spent was just me myself & I. Ah feels so good to be alone once in awhile (: somebody smsed me around seven in the evening asking me to go to the void deck & bring a lighter. Thank youuuu so much for making all the way here (: for the first time in a long time I finally blew out a candle & made a wish. So other than this person, the ones that I've seen in this whole day is my mum, my brother & my dad. Hahahaha I sound so pathetic it's like I'm some emo-kid that shuts myself out from the rest of this world.
*\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/* *\O/*
Sixteen of em' because I turn sixteen on the sixteenth.
(Can't you see they're cheerleaders with their pompoms.)
Tuesday, July 15, 2008 @ 11:15 PM
One last hour.
Maybe tomorrow I'll leave my computer alone & switch off my cellphone. I'll wake up early & be a happy girl. I'll make myself breakfast, then take a nice long bath. Next I'll throw on my Manchester United jersey, put on my pink sneakers & wear the white cap. I'll head out to the places that I've never been to/haven't been to in a long time. I'll capture everything with my camera so that I'll still have a little bit of it to keep untill I'm grey & wrinkly. I will then settle down at my favourite Japanese restaurant & I will finally have a proper meal. Then I'll head off to the Ben & Jerry's at Dempsey Hill & order a Vermonster. Becoming fat would be the last thing on my mind, I'll finish everything & I'll enjoy myself. After that I will walk to Orchard with my headphones blasting all of my favourite songs from Hillsong. While walking I will sing like nobody can hear me & I won't care how horrible I'll sound. I will go shopping & I won't hold back, I will buy everything that catches my eye even if they are unecessary. Next I'll go shopping for presents for the people that's in my 'people that I will love until the day I die' list. I'll spend forever choosing the perfect present for each individual. Next I will sit down at a Starbucks & order my favourite dark mocha frappuchino. Then maybe I will catch a movie, order popcorn, laugh/cry my hardest & hug myself when I feel cold. Next I'll go to Labrador Park, sit near the jetty & catch the sunset. I will sit & watch the amazing ball of fire go beyond the horizon while my favourite songs play. After night falls I will head home on my own, & I won't be afraid at all. Because for the whole day, I haven't been alone. There has been One Person with me all along.
I just want to spend my birthday with You.
10:10 PM
Reciting your number so I won't forget
Then I'll
Then I'll
Then I'll
Then I'll
Then I'll
Then I'll
Then I'll
Then I'll
Then I'll
Then I'll
Then I'll
Then I'll
Then I'll
Then I'll
Then I'll
Then I'll
Then I'll
Then I'll
Then I'll
Then I'll
Then I'll
Today when I was walking towards home I actually picked flowers. When I reached the lift I decided that I didn't really want to take them home, so I scattered all of them onto the ground. I honestly thought they looked quite pretty all over the place, even though they didn't belong there. Forty-five minutes after I reached home, mummy came back with Brayden & she went, 'I wonder which idiot littered the ground floor with flowers!!'
Monday, July 14, 2008 @ 10:59 PM
Hi,
Sunday, July 13, 2008 @ 11:44 PM
Your love, it broke my fall.
STUART TAN
• Stacy; says:
I NEED MOTIVATION TO STUDY
• Stacy; says:
HELP
Stuart. † Created a Blog, PLEASE GO TAG.. THANKS [STUDYING]. says:
Stacy, study.
Stuart. † Created a Blog, PLEASE GO TAG.. THANKS [STUDYING]. says:
there you go.
What the hell hahahaha. Sometimes I really feel like asking God: WHY HAVE YOU GIVEN ME SUCH A COUSIN?!!!!!!!!
(But it's okay Stuart Tan Jiazhi I still love you the same!)
Anyanyanyanyanyanyanyanyanyanyway. I'm still happy, currently it's raining cats & dogs outside but it's not dampening my mood at all (: I'm so happy my thoughts are all over the place so haha I actually feel kind of crazy right now.
I woke up in time for class today, & Ryan didn't call (thank God) Breakfast was on him & it's all thanks to the coffee that kept me awake during service. So thank youuuu Ryan.
I borrowed Joel's EZlink card today because mine ran out of cash & it was quite dumb to walk to NAFA under that scorching sun. Hahahaha I had such a good laugh at his photo. Speaking about photos, I was so upset when I got back my photos this early afternoon because both my frames were scratched, & at that moment in time I really felt like screaming at those people there but that's not going to erase the scratches anyway so...
But to think that they're an arts school, & yet they actually don't even take care of other people's works. If they were the ones trusting their works into someone else's hands, & the people that received their works actually damaged it, how would they feel about it? I was telling Korkor that I should've just scolded the shit out of them, & demand payment or something hahaha.
You can go on & say that I'm overreacting, I'm not stopping you, but my works just mean a lot to me. Fullstop.
(But they don't mean so much to the extend that I would feel like I would die if God were to ever ask me to sacrifice them)(Hahahahahaha hi Philip we are people not of this world!)
There's still another three days to my birthday but I feel loved already. Thank you all so much, especially to those that actually wants to sponsor my shopping as a birthday present (many hugssss for you people), also to the people that didn't know what to give me & just gave me cash, you guys really didn't have to!!! & not forgetting Walter & Marcus Lim! You guys are so adorable hahaha. Love the cap & your cards! (:
I miss cutting birthday cakes. Seriously. I think the last time I actually cut a cake was when I was erm ten. Hahahaha oh no I have no childhood/life.
Okay it's bedtime & there's another five days of hell (according to Steph) ahead.
Psalm 37:4 - "Delight yourself in the Lord & He shall give to you the desires of your heart."
Saturday, July 12, 2008 @ 11:12 PM
Oh happy day.
Because:
1. Lunch was great.
It feels like the last time I actually stepped into Plaza Sing or rather anywhere near town was like erm four thousand years ago (I think if I feel that way then it must be it) So yes I have no life. Lunch was at Ajisen, Starbucks after that, mmmm I love DMF so much but yes I love Tabbi & Steph & Isa & Aunty Lydia much more hahaha.
2. Received my first birthday present (:
Thank you Philipppp so much for the beearlied (it's the opposite of belated) present (: it's really cute hahaha (:
3. JG was great.
Ah, nuff' said (:
4. Joel bought me Toblerone (yayyyy)
An insanely overdued 'reward' but hahaha thank you so much!
(Anyway. I forgot to tell you something just now & I probably won't see you tomorrow so just to let you know: I have quite a lot to tell you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
5. Dinner was great.
Yay Pastamaniaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! Sam, KS, Isa, Chow, Ryan, Steph, Philip & I finished erm. Five (yes five) cans of cheese. Out of the five, Steph, Philip & I probably finished four (I'm serious.) Chow, Ryan & KS were being so annoying after the rest left, they were so desperate to squeeeezeeee 'information' out of me. It was so ridiculous. Hi guys, nice try today but better luck next time! (:
Okay my little teddy bear says she wants a hug & I've got to get up at !!!!!!!! six forty-five tomorrow so byeeeeeeeeeee.
(Ryan wants to wake me up tomorrow because he thinks that I'll be so drowsy in the morning I'll acidentally spill something out. Idiot.)
Friday, July 11, 2008 @ 10:49 PM
I'm not missing you
Walnut: That's not my name!
Me: Idiot!
Walnut: That's not my name!
Fiona: Stupid!
Walnut: That's not my name!
Me: CRAZY STUPID IDIOT
Walnut: THAT'S NOT MY NAME!!!! THAT'S NOT MY NAME!!!!!!!!
(Inside joke.)
I love my buddies :D
There's another hundred & one days to go. This will probably be the last national exam I'll ever take in my life & this is my chance to make up for all these years. How many times have I screwed up my papers because I resorted to 'last-minute' studying? This time I can't afford to repeat this mistake. Some people may see freedom in about four months time, but I see it as a insane rush to the top.
This is a mad race, but I'm glad I still have the people that care in my life! (:
(Thank you Joy for being there! ♥♥♥♥♥♥)(Sorry that I kind of drowned you in all of my rantings)
Lunch tomorrow with Tab Steph Isa + Aunty Lydia. Now THAT'S something to look forward to.
Thursday, July 10, 2008 @ 10:18 PM
I'll be the reason for your pain, & you can put the blame on me
Well I didn't even get through one chapter.
When boredom screams at you, 'kill me!!!':
Love bestieeee
Erm... No.
Haha Warren Lee you retarded nonsense.
Hello Dennissss
This was an unintentional shot I promiseeee (he was just changing in class)
Dennis: Delete the picture!!!!
Warren: CAN YOU STOP THROWING YOUR RUBBISH INTO MY POCKET!!
Me: (:
This is the picture that we snapped when our Physics teacher went: 'PERPENDICULAR DISTANCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" (the next second Warren was laughing his ass off. Literally)
♥ Fiona & Dennis & Warren Leeee.
The four of us just got 'separated' today thanks to the new sitting arrangement. Dennis is now at the other side of the classroom, Warren is two seats infront of us, while Fiona & I are still next to each other.
I miss my best friend(sss)!!!! ):
This morning, Josephine wore her PE shorts the wrong way round & it was so hilarioussss. We had such a good laugh hahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaa.
During our free period we had a huge debate about Christianity, Jesus & everything along that line. It was the Christians against the non-Christians (duh) & it was funny, in a way. But yet at the same time it was truly fustrating because it was the three of us (Dennis, Fiona & yours truly) against Larry, Niegel, Desmond, Sihao & Jiehan. They were just throwing questions (that I honestly will label as stupid but then again I can't blame them because they have never expierienced Christ's love) in our faces & it was crazy. It was really really crazy. I wished I could've done better, but I'm glad we tried. The most hair-ripping/fist-clenching part was that whatever we said, the five of them just treated it as crap.
I was so proud of Dennis throughout the whole thing. He really tried his best to counter everything that the guys threw at us. When Desmond said something about God rescuing only the 'good' people & not the 'bad', Dennis replied "God loves everyone". It may be a simple, three word sentence, but he said it with such conviction.
& that shut the five of them up. For awhile.
Well another day just went by like that.
Quek is leaving for NS tomorrow. Mannnn it really seems like yesterday it was still 04' JG camp & he still had his bleached hair! But like what I told him yesterday, in life all of us have to move on in one way or another...
Marcus Lim's birthday was yesterday. Which means that mine must really be coming (our birthdays are a week apart)
I'm making full use of this last week. I'm going to use this seven days, to forget & let go of all that has happened in the previous year. Sure, time flies, but it's still been long year. Though sometimes when I think of certain things, I still feel the pain, but I'm thankful...
It will all get better in time.
Tuesday, July 8, 2008 @ 11:50 PM
Yet another day & she lifts her head
Sure, I've been stumbling, falling, & flopping all this while. But still I choose to thank You for every break that's in my heart, because I know that no matter how bruised or battered I am, I am still safe in Your hands. Your strength is above all strengths, & I make it through each day with your daily sufficient grace. In just a week or so I'll be another year older & I don't know what awaits me in the next year, but I will still put my trust in You.
I've reached yet another dead-end & You know I feel like trash. I do hate how for all this while, there's been more reasons for me to cry & be upset about, rather than for me to smile. When I'm not even over what happened before, another piece of nonsense hits me straight in the face. It all adds up... In a way. I know it's
It's painful but I've got to do it. I've got, to do it. I can't fall with my eyes shut, because I can't rely on certain people to catch me anymore.
But You'll still be there, right?
School was so insanely boring, partly because Dennis wasn't around for me to make a fuss about, met him on the bus when I was returning home & it turned out that he got suspended because of his hair (hahahahahahahaha serve you right.)
I had to serve a three hour detention today. Which was. Shitttt. It was quite dumb to be sitting outside the detention room but still I'm proud to say that I've completed four Physics papers. Just when I was blanking out after two hours or so, my 'Saviour' came (:
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Karim!!!!!!!!! Omg hahaha I love him so much. He plopped himself on the bench that's opposite mine, suddenly said "I've got chocolate" & mannnn you should've seen the way my eyes literally lit up at the sound of 'chocolate'. So the both of us sat there, munching away, talking rubbish, being stupid... Untill he had to go sit at the other bench because we got caught ):
Shit it's Wednesday tomorrow.
Monday, July 7, 2008 @ 11:23 PM
When you say love makes the world go round
To put it bluntly, who are you to me? Why should I let you make me feel upset? I don't think I'll ever be bothered to even poke the tip of my nose into your life anymore. You keep losing my respect for you.
I walked through your door & into your life, but it's also time you learnt the fact that I can walk out of it anytime.
I always said that I'll be here for you, but really, you shouldn't take it for granted.
I slept for twelve hours straight. I know I ought to be happy about it but honestly I woke up feeling quite terrible because it was somebody's sms that woke me up (it was an sms sent to the wrong number)(thanks, whoever you are) & after that I couldn't go back to sleep ):
LH & I were supposed to catch a movie together with Fiona but hahaha she must've pissed her mum off real bad or something because she refused to let her out of the house. So LH & I decided to do a bit of window shopping ($$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ please drop from Heaven), a bit of munching on nonsense, a bit of bitching...
Speaking which, YOUTUBE IS CURRENTLY BEING A BITCH!!!!
Okay anyway. We hit the library then it's off to her place. I seriously feel like keeping another hamster ): I wonder how's Duke doing. (Honestly I think Duke should be dead by now because I had him when I was. Erm, nine.)
I'm quite afraid that the little thing would make my room smell like trash because there's nowhere else in the house I can keep it. My brother would just squash it to death or something. & then you know what they always say about 'the responsibility of having a pet'... I really feel kind of useless so I guess right now it's better that I don't take on any responsibility (haha.)
I wonder if I should give it a shot & join Danzity. Sure, I do miss dancing, I really really do. It's been forever since I could actually say, 'Give me a dancefloor, a DJ, & I'll feel better'. Maybe I've already forgotten how it feels like to hit the floor at the end of a tired long day, how I would actually feel better once I sweat it all out & let go of all the pent-up emotions that are inside. I know what I've been resorting to is bad, but should I sacrifice... Myself? Like what somebody told me, there's gotta be a boundary somewhere. How far would I let a person have his/her way with me?
Such emotion, such passion, such intensity. I really doubt myself. I don't think I'll ever be able to do it like that again.
1:03 PM
God provides =)
Joel. Learned to let go. says:
literally
• Stacy; says:
"okay God i won't work i know You'll provide"
• Stacy; says:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Joel. Learned to let go. says:
I SLAP U
Saturday, July 5, 2008 @ 11:28 PM
I may have failed but I have loved you from the start
Went to school early this morning for the stupid paper. There was this very interesting yet annoying question:
Some countries oppose to the use of GM food. What is your opinion? Explain.
My answer:
I don't think any countries should oppose to the use of GM food because they really do make life better.
The best part is that the question's worth eight marks.
I finished the whole paper exactly fifty-five minutes after it started. When I finished my last sentence (which was also the one on the GM food), I put down my pen, looked around, & realised that everyone was still scribbling away. I thought, shitttt.
I then spent the next thirty-five minutes thinking of ponies & bubblegums & pretty dresses & erm Ryan Giggs.
Imma score for the paper & so pass it with flying colours hahahaha.
Collected my photos today & I just finished my write-ups on both photos about an hour ago. I seriously amaze myself at times. I only had 72 hours or so to complete everything (thanks to my very wonderful teacher that only told me on Thursday that the deadline's tomorrow) & yup it's all done & I'm very happy (:
Finally, a little bit of shopping today. The checkpoint is the best place to get bargains, I promise. Ditched my old white sneakers & bought new ones today. I think very soon I won't be able to tolerate the fact that they're so white so yes I'll probably be putting a little bit of glitter on them soon (:
I am now in love with the erm little shrimps thing they have at Long John's. They look cute, seriously. Oh they taste yummy too. I really think it's just about time I saved myself & hide away all the weighing machines at home because I think I will just die when I weigh myself.
Ivan: Wow you kept your shoes so clean.
Me: Erm it's because I just bought them today.
Tomorrow would be a longggggggggggggggg day ):
Friday, July 4, 2008 @ 12:56 AM
IF YOU STILL HAVE A LITTLE BIT OF BRAINS, THEN I HOPE YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO. BUT I GUESS YOUR BRAIN IS PROBABLY LIQUID-SHIT, SO I'M TELLING YOU NOW WHAT TO DO.
YOU JOLLY WELL STAY AWAY FROM MY KILL.
I KNOW WHAT'S UP YOUR SLEEVE, SO DON'T PLAY GAMES WITH ME.
YOU, JOLLY, WELL, STAY, AWAY, FROM, MY, KILL.
Thursday, July 3, 2008 @ 11:37 PM
As a friend I believe I have already done my part. You refuse to move on with your life, too bad, because I will move on with mine. The next time history repeats itself, I will not care. I promise you, I will not care. You get yourself in this situation, then you jolly well get yourself out of it. It is pointless for me to put out my hand anymore, because we all know how the ending would be.
This time I am really disappointed in you. Really. You make me want to give up all hope on you.
He can only fill you up this much. He makes you happy for awhile. Tell me other than the adrenaline rush you get from his fucking, what can he give to you?
You let him play around with you. You let him call you a slut. You let him make you cry. You let him break your heart. You let him use you as a sperm toilet. & as if that's not enough, you return back to him after he says some pathetic words, & maybe a few smses with the words 'I'll change'
Have a little bit more self-dignity, would you?
& no I don't bloody give a damn as to who sees this. I repeat: I Don't Give A Damn.
Wednesday, July 2, 2008 @ 11:59 PM
Can you come a little closer?
Today I had a very happy walk under the rain.
I was thinking, do we only fall for people that are like ourselves, because we all relate to things that are familiar? Or do we go for the people that are worlds apart from us, because they are just simply everything that we're not?
Then, is it possible, to have an ineffable feeling of affection for someone you're not even familiar or acquainted with?
How many times can you actually fall in love? Once? Twice? A million times? At times it feels like you've loved too much, yet sometimes you feel like you've never really loved anyone before. Sometimes we fall for the same person over again. Why? Is it because you've never really got over him/her? Or is it that you just simply Care for the same person, & you love him/her in a different way? Sometimes we say we feel a sense of affection towards a person that we're unfamiliar with. Why? Don't we only fall for people that we know & trust? Or is it just simply, infatuation? Sometimes people around us get together & they say it was 'love at first sight'. Why? Is it possible to fall for somebody only by laying eyes on them? Is it even possible to fall for someone when we don't even know them? Sometimes we fall out of love & we fall into the arms of someone else with great ease. Why? If we're able to get over the past relationship with such great ease, then previously we weren't really in love, right? Then again, how come when we're still in it, we say we're "in love"?
How, do you even fall in love? No really, how?
Tuesday, July 1, 2008 @ 11:31 PM
I gotta be next to you.
Then again, no, I think I'd want to keep you in there.
Even though somebody just pissed me off, I refuse to focus on the unhappy things tonight. No not tonight. I ought to be happy.
I loveeee my best friend(s). They're amazing. No really, I mean it, they're amazing. Yesterday evening we sat at the staircase near Lynn's place for about an hour or so, happily bitching about anything & everything.
& then we happily set my camera on timer:
Missing Rachel ):
I love you guys because you all make looking/being stupid ridiculously fun, because of the way you can make me burst out into laughter when I'm at the pits, because we always made up no matter what the reason was for falling out with one another, because of all the love & support you have given to me, because of the way you would stand up for me, because I can be who I am when I'm around you guys, because of the way you guys always seem to understand even when I say nothing at all, because of how our personalities compliment each other's, because of the way we used to sit outside our class playing random songs from Rachel's phone & singing our hearts out (though once in awhile we go out of tune), because of the way we'll link our hands together when we're out, because of the way we always make fun of one another's typo errors... Because of the endless reasons, of why I love you.
This is a foursome (:
Well anyway. School today, believe it or not, was fun.
Fiona & I decided to join our tables with Dennis & Warren since the both of them seemed really lonely (haha), so for almost the whole of today, the four of us were actually
I think Fiona should be labeled as the joke-of-the-day. During lesson today she gave up copying the notes on the screen because she couldn't see (she forgot her spectacles.) My dearest best friend then happily crushed, smashed, rolled the foolscap paper into a pathetic little ballll, left it on her table & wasted her time away. At the end of the lesson, the teacher went, "I want to take a look at your work so please hand it up." Fiona then looked at me & went, "Shitttt."
Quote of the day: Sour Unbearables!!!!
Heehee I love my buddies so much.
I'm half-caught in the middle. A part of me don't want to sink into it but then another part of me is saying to put my heart into it & just, try.
Certain people are happy & they want me to go ahead with it. Fiona went "let nature take its course" but then again, what if history repeats itself? What if things wound up to be just like what happened eleven months ago? Besides... ):
At this moment, right now, there's only one thing that I'm clear of - I can't afford to make reckless decisions anymore.
Saturday, June 28, 2008 @ 3:51 AM
Oh my pretty pretty boy
I seriously think that YW* is, !!!! cute. Ah-ma-gaddddd he's so cute he makes me want to hug & suffocate him.
Me: Hopeless case.
Fiona: No!!!! There's still hope!!!!
Me: -.- How come you are more determined than me? -.-
Fiona is so crazily mean, because of YW she actually put down somebody else that's, wellllllllllll. Close. To her.
(Hi Fiona if you're reading this I'm actually laughing already)(I promise to make an effort to go over to your place more often hahahahaha)
& then your royal highness had to try so insanely hard to push the oh-so-delightfully-adorableeee boy out of my head & return back to my books ):
* Names have been changed hahahaha (well you'll never know who comes by here)
Anyway, I feel like a pig. Yesterday in the middle of the night, my little tummy decided to give its owner a hell of a time & went crazy. It was like the food I pampered myself with about 5 hours ago just reduced to tiny microscopic things. So I, despite all my efforts to keep myself on the chair that I'm sitting on now, broke loose & like an excited puppy that's unleashed, I ran (yes ran) to the kitchen, ate two apples, a whole bar of Toblerone, downed a packet of chocolate milk, finished up the leftovers from dinner (pork chop heeheeheeeeeyummeh) with an insane amount of tomato ketchup (:, fried myself an egg, ate butter cookies...
Then, finally, my tummy was satisfied & I returned back to this computer, a very happy girl.
& to make me feel even more like a pig, I woke up at two today. But then again, sleeping makes me happy. So I'm a happier girl.
& My body clock is returning to normal. Finally it knows what's day & night. Yay. I'm a very, insanely, happy, girl (: (: (: (:
On a heavier note, despite my crazy mugging, I've another seven chapters of notes to complete ): & I don't know where the hell are my notes on Newtonian Mechanics. I hope after my MYEs I didn't take them as some trash & just simply chuck them into the chute. I seriously seriously seriously hope they aren't already disintegrated into erm. Little pieces of things.
Gym on Monday, anyone?
Okay bedtime.
(Shit the boy is still in my head.)
Friday, June 27, 2008 @ 10:09 PM
Clickety clickety.
YAY WEEKENDS YAY!
3:10 PM
If you're wondering why I'm home so early,
Hit the gym yesterday with Neoneo Machi & Lihong, together with Dennis,
Certain interesting events took place & certain people definitely gave Neoneo Machi & I something to talk about, I admit it was wrong to talk about somebody like that but seriously, it's time some people stop acting like they're on top of the world & that they're in control of everything. When you get into trouble yourself, I'd definitely like to see what sort of reaction you'd give. Sure, yesterday I could've picked up my phone & simply punch in some numbers but what's the point? That's only going to waste money and besides, being a girl it was already wrong to be there to witness all that happened. If you think I'm a selfish bitch that refuses to help my friends when they're in trouble, then carry on with that thinking of yours because it doesn't hurt me in any way. I've been there, done that, & I just don't get myself involved with such things anymore. If you think it's tough being in a fight, grow up, because it's tougher to walk away from one.
I was talking to Chris the other day & I wondered why everybody calls me Stacy & no one calls me Stace anymore.
Well anyway.
Things are looking up. Well it seems to be, though there are times at night I still feel like something is missing. Certain things I used to find as easy as 123 are now becoming difficult. I wonder why is that so. Have I not been trying? Have I been looking in all the wrong places? Have I been searching too far, when You're beside me, all along? I know Your plans are to prosper & not to harm, but how come I've been taking matters into my own hands, instead of trusting You? How come sometimes it just feels like, You're not here?
Damn enough of that I feel so depressed now. Anyway, Ms Shirley came to look for Meiqi & I yesterday. Her little piece of news definitely ignited something in me (: I know that I'd be picking up yet another thing that I could just leave alone, but it's near impossible to just let this chance pass me by. I guess now I've got to manage my time well-er than well, because this would be taking up quite some time & time, is something that I really need a lot & can't afford to waste. This is one huge risk, but let's imagine, if I clinch the scholarship...
I once told God that if, there was one last thing He'd do for me, I'd want Him to take me away from here & bring me somewhere else. Tonight yet another somebody I know is leaving for Australia, & I just can't help but think, what I'm going to do if I'm the one leaving for another place. All my family & friends are here in Singapore & if I really were to go, I know it'll take a lot of me to just say goodbye. There's a lot to consider, a lot to think about. It'll be tough adapting to a new environment, it'll hurt. But the thought of starting anew somewhere else, in a place where nobody knows my name, definitely beats staying around here, hands down. Maybe, just maybe, if there's a good enough reason for me to stay, I would.
Nothing is holding me back now. Nobody is stopping me. I know all along I've been randomly saying that I want to go get a tattoo, but nowadays I've been seriously thinking of getting one to mark this point of my life. I'm thinking of getting a Kanji tattoo on my back, so I should get Tabbi to do my draft for me (: Pain? Screw pain. Pain is nothing.
Ah, this has been such a long wordy post. Well done if you've managed to read everything, o' faithful reader.
Wednesday, June 25, 2008 @ 11:00 PM
Sweet embrace.
I give all of you (except Chris) permission to knock my head if I'm caught doing anything else other than studying on Sundays afternoon.
I had no freaking guts to pop the sleeping pills so I had another sleepless night. Again. Sigh.
I bet today Fiona had a wonderful time at home & in bed while I was stuck in school ): I got caught daydreaming during Physics, left seven out of twenty-two Maths questions blank (-.-), forced myself to stay awake & paid attention to le' monster that's a hundred & seven years old (haha), got veryyyy annoyed by Ammonia gas, actually for once felt smart during ASP, went over to Fiona's (Sebas VERY conveniently called me to buy food for him -.-) & actually managed to revise on my so-called exam next Saturday (GAH SATURDAYYYY!!!!!!)
I miss my guitar. It's been sitting at the corner in my room for four thousand years & I've been ignoring its screams for attention. I ought to restring it soon. Yes soon.
Well for now I shall try to close my eyes & go into the periodic state of rest for the mind & body. Oh God I neeeed sleeeep.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008 @ 11:58 PM
Be the bass.
I haven't done this in awhile, so I don't know what to say
"But Lord I feel so small sometimes, in this big old place,
Yeah I know there's more important things,
But don't forget to remember me."
School was a bore & my timetable suckssss to the core.
Thank you Fiona for listening to me today, I felt so much better after pouring everything out (: don't know what I'd do without you & I'm really thankful that God has placed you in my life. Love you best friend.
Crossroads. I have no time to spare so I'm making my decision now, I can't waste anymore time being sandwiched. I need to get over it. Putting a hold on my commitments & letting go really isn't easy... Then again I guess certain sacrifices have to be made if I want to become who I want to be.
God you know I really want to trust my whole being & my whole life into Your hands. Right now I just don't know how to.
Don't forget to remember me.
12:11 AM
Monday, June 23, 2008 @ 11:40 PM
Your joy will be my strength
On a lighter note, I did manage to catch some sleep in school today (haha.) It was recess before my MT lesson, so I happily slept throughout the one & a half hour. I don't remember standing up to greet the teacher, & he didn't bother to wake both me & Fiona up either so...
Met Joel at the Macdonald's at KAP later in the afternoon, & I honestly think he had a really enjoyable time laughing at my previous mid year papers ): sometimes he can really make me feel stupid. But then I did come home smarter (haha), & also with tomato sauce on the sleeve of my 07' JG camp tee.
Joel: It's okay it's both red anyway.
Should ask Luke to slap his face more (HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA.)
I was walking back home today & I was thinking about all that's happened in the past few days. Perhaps instead of dwelling on all the disappointments that certain people keep making me take in, I should start putting in an effort to get over it & look forward. There's still this passion that burns in me despite all that has happened. Maybe one day I'll gain back the same courage & strength I used to have to give it another try. But not now, I guess. I'm too tired.
The people that I trusted in & cared about the most, aren't here. The ones that I originally thought would walk out of my life, are actually the ones that stayed behind & pushed me on. You know who you are (especially the one that stayed up yesterday night & kept encouraging me through your smses until you finally fell asleep), thank you (:
In the secret place of refuge,
Lord I will, Sing.
1:23 AM
we'll be falling asleep in classes
FIONA;FNWQ says:
yah, esp in, tmr got what lesson can slp uh?
• Stacy; says:
oh shit there's no chinese tomorrow
• Stacy; says:
erm...
FIONA;FNWQ says:
maths? =/
FIONA;FNWQ says:
aiya, not mr ng anymore -.-
FIONA;FNWQ says:
EFFF
• Stacy; says:
ya!!!!!!!!!!!!
• Stacy; says:
ZOMG for the first time in my life i wished we had more lectures
I already told you I'd be some freaking nocturnal animal. Looks like I'm not the only one. Maybe I should watch the Spain/Italy match tonight.
Sunday, June 22, 2008 @ 11:06 PM
If time would stop for us.
Time is passing so quickly it doesn't even feel like half a year is gone. Reality is sinking in & it's so tough, everything seems to be pressing on me all at once. My body clock is currently screwed, so I have no idea how on earth I am going to wake up in time for school, or rather, sleep in time. In the day I'm so ridiculously tired, it's as though my eyelids weigh a ton. Then, at night I'm a freaking nocturnal animal.
I'm going straight for the sleeping pills tomorrow if I don't sleep well again tonight.
I'm so sick & tired of what has been going on. Why do I always seem to breathe in constant disappointment? Why is it that it's always the same people that let me down? It's funny, how the people whom I never really knew well nor confided in, are actually the ones that are encouraging me & pushing me forward. Somebody told me today to enjoy the love I'm surrounded in, but whatever happened to the people that I thought, genuinely cared?
I'd love to stay around, but being sandwiched in such situations can really take a toll on me. Sooner or later I'd still have to make a decision, right?
But maybe all I'm looking for, is just a good enough reason why.
Saturday, June 21, 2008 @ 11:59 PM
Liar, liar, pants on fire.
I hope you've had your fun & you're happy, because now I am all messed up. I am only in such a screwed situation not because I am weak, but because your words & your actions are enough to pierce through the strongest soul.
You freaking broke me & said sorry. But then after that you had the damned guts to carry on pushing me around & even made me your sidekick. As if that wasn't enough, you just had to throw my dream on the ground today. Just what the hell do you want from me? Does it thrills you to see me in such a pathetic state now?
I never should've believed you when you said that you genuinely wanted to help me reach the top. All you gave were empty promises.
10:59 PM
Only six because I am lazy.
They are my two new best friends.
This very adorable goose, chased after me right after I snapped the photo ):
Blue skies (:
(:
Friday, June 20, 2008 @ 9:38 PM
I know it was supposed to be a 10 day trip,
I am back:
1. refreshed, recharged, & ready to go.
2. with two bags, one filled to the point where it's already impossible to squeeze even a windbreaker in (I went with a bag that's only half filled.)
Out of the 260 hours there, I probably spent 259 hours shopping.
... Okay no.
Anyway, I am too lazy to upload the pathetic 12 or 13 pictures I took during the trip, so you people would have to wait for it (:
The trip was great/fabulous/amazing. Other than that I really don't know how else to describe my trip. Mummy is still the same insane, mum (she told me about how she once fell asleep on a motorbike.) Three cheers for her because she paid for all of my indulgence(s). My little sister is slowly but surely growing up, she's such an adorable little thing she really makes me want to ditch my teddy bear & just hug her to sleep instead. Three cheers for her too because she's just so, delightfully lovable.
The friends & the family, everyone else, are good.
Monday, June 9, 2008 @ 2:25 PM
My blue sky holiday
Hi to the church campers (because it'll be at least Thursday when you see this), hope all of you had fun! (:
Bye to everyone else, I'll be missing all of you so miss me too!
See you all lovelies in 10 days' time,
xoxo ♥
Sunday, June 8, 2008 @ 11:34 PM
One step, two.
It felt really weird being in church on a Sunday morning yet not going for Powerhouse. I think I am already too used to the way things are on a typical Sunday. I love the kids & I know I adore serving in the children's ministry, but right now I really feel that things have already reached a point where it's just like a weekly routine. I'll be away for more than a week, which means that I'll be missing this coming Sunday's event, which also means I have only one more week left to serve in Powerhouse before I put a hold on my commitments. In a way I can't 'bear' to step away, but I guess I should at least get right with myself before I return back to Powerhouse because God deserves my best & nothing less.
Tonight I feel weirdly alone. There's no older brother for me to rant at, no big bully around to bully me, no Sam Chua Ming Shien for me to go 'who lives in a pineapple under the sea', no Chris for me to talk rubbish to when I'm bored, no Walter to suddenly pop out out of nowhere saying random things...
I MISS THE CHURCH CAMPERS!
Okay I feel really depressed now so I should really go to a little dark corner & draw circles.
Anyway before I go, this is erm, for entertainment purposes:
(Hahahaha.)
Saturday, June 7, 2008 @ 11:54 PM
How to save a life.
You begin to wonder why you came
Hahahahahahaaaa shit this is like such a retarded pose.
±Яoѕicky.--\™ meh-ve [[ 10 ]]... ♥ollipers(: says:
just post big big that this is your best and only older brother u got(:
So yes, this is my best & only older brother I've got.
(Sorry ladies, he was an eligible bachelor but is already taken)
Shit-geons.
Watching that amazing ball of fire disappear beyond the horizon was.
My ass muscles are aching. Must be from all the walking yesterday.
Looks like whether or not I go for church camp, I'll still be in Malaysia. Mummy dropped me a message yesterday saying "I'll be fetching you either on Monday or Tuesday." I'm like !!!!!!!! Can you be more impromptu than this?!!!!
Dinner today with some of the JGians was so crazy. We were having some insane "ice war". Sam & his matrix was !!!! Hilarious.
I wonder if Neoneo Machi is back from Hong Kong. I hope that faggot got something back for me.
Friday, June 6, 2008 @ 11:46 PM
Stacy,
Hello fellow earthlings, today I:
- Walked from Queenstown to Harbourfront
- Braved the heights at the treetop walk (or whatever you call it)
- Conquered Mount Faber
- Didn't complain at all even though the sun was crazy & it was so ridiculously humid
- Realised that I have tan lines on my little feet because of my slippers (!!!!)
- Nearly tripped over a staircase
- Ate a donut at Vivocity :D
- Went to Labrador Park
- Walked even more
- Felt the seabreeze
- Caught the sunset
My feet are so tired I think I can hear them yawn. Oh just what would I do without you, legs. I promise to treat the both of you better. Yes I promise.
Okay bye I am going to sleep now honestly the bed has been screaming my name for the past one hour or so.
1:40 AM
<3
Thursday, June 5, 2008 @ 6:48 PM
It's blue & wet outside,
Noun
1. a. Water condensed from atmospheric vapor and falling in drops. b. A fall of such water; a rainstorm.
But I'm warm inside.
2:19 AM
Tsktsk.
Do you really think that with all the little piece of nonsense that you've been throwing at my way, you can take me down just like that? Is that all you've got? Oh sniggers.
Keep dreaming, I'm not like any of your easy targets. So try me. I've got a stronger backbone than yours, little weakling.
Wednesday, June 4, 2008 @ 1:24 AM
Hey,
Tuesday, June 3, 2008 @ 6:31 PM
For the record:
1. I have stated very clearly, & not only once - that I am not mad at anyone, only the particular subject. You must've thought too highly of yourself when you said that I was mad at you.
2. Then, despite all that I've said, you still chose to think that I am mad at you. Little girl, do enlighten me, is it my fault now that you don't understand what I'm talking about?
3. Do, for pete's sake, try to stop pushing all the blame to us. Or in this case, to only one person. You guys are picking on the ones that you think are easy targets. Why don't you pick on me instead? Little girl, learn about what's responsibility before you talk to me about anything else.
4. Perhaps you're trying to tell me you have people to be your backbone. But by dragging your friends into the picture, you're only inviting mine to be part of the story.
5. Smart move by mentioning cops but try harder if you want to scare me. I do not see what's wrong in saying that I don't like what you're posting & voicing out how I feel. Oh yes, freedom of speech, right?
6. But for your information, I bet you didn't know that it isn't called 'Freedom of Speech' anymore if what you're saying hurts someone's pride. But if that's your defination of 'Freedom of Speech, then I will go along with your defination.
7. Even people that has nothing to do with this says that you people are sounding like kids that has got nothing better to do. So little girl, if you want to bring me down, you've gotta try much harder.
8. You are not the real deal. I am.
Thankyouhaveaniceday.
Monday, June 2, 2008 @ 1:04 AM
Undying love
(Almost) everyone would be going to Malaysia this coming Sunday for church camp & having fun for the next few days. Stacy here would be stuck in Singapore & at home.
Sad life ):
Sunday, June 1, 2008 @ 11:15 PM
Another heart of its own
Namida,
Haruka,
Misha ("Hihi!"),
& Miko (:
Erm no, he's not a doll, obviously. I just thought he was quite hot.
The heavens started to pour when Steph & I left for Lavender. The both of us obviously aren't the type that would carry umbrellas around, so we, braved the rain.
Was on the way to the MRT after JG with Steph, Ryan, Joel & Benett, when we saw a cat that was stuck on some ledge.
Spent 20 whole minutes thinking of how to get the kitty down. I was just about to go into somebody's shop to ask if I could climb through their window so I could get the little thing, when its eyes were finally opened & it jumped into somebody's house through a semi-open window.
Everybody: ............
Me: Yay don't y'all feel better now that the kitty is safe?
Back to City Hall:
I really adore the sisters.
I can actually imagine Namida in a little dark corner.
Behind the scenes:
Yes, it's really not an easy job.
I really apologise for some of the very lousy shots. I actually forgot to bring an extra roll of film so I had no choice but to turn to my little Sony digital camera, which is, sadly, dying on me ):
I hope I don't get "poisoned". Not now at least. The dolls are really pretty & honestly after yesterday, I'm actually quite tempted to get a girl.
...........
Nononononono Stacy, think of your Nikon D80 Nikon D80 Nikon D80 Nikon D80...